by Shauna Brown
During church today I was impressed as the speaker spoke of the importance of not only having a testimony of Jesus Christ, but the value of sharing it often and openly with others. That was really interesting as last night I dreamed I was giving a talk about Jesus Christ to a congregation of prisoners. They were all dressed alike in cranberry jump suits. Some were clean shaven while others had distasteful words tattooed upon their faces, which was most disturbing.
Now, in real life I have spoken in prison. During those experiences I was shown great respect by those in attendance. However, in my dream last night, as I looked at this ‘very real congregation,’ I could feel a brewing of hatred, eyes that despised. Sadly as I spoke I had to endure, and even pause to regain composure, as a few of the group voiced aloud filthy language that made me anxious. So disruptive they became that several times a couple of inmates were removed from the room.
I had prepared my talk well I thought, and as I sought to testify of Jesus and my love for him, a young man yelled out, “What do you really know of Jesus Christ?” It was then that my heart took hold of the stirring moment and I felt my heart pound heavy. I couldn’t talk, and for a brief time my emotions freely let go, and the tears rolled down my cheeks. Before my eyes a flood of tender mercies paraded through my mind. I placed the pages of my prepared talk upon the podium, and stepped closer to the congregation. A guard drew closer, but I didn’t feel afraid.
“What do I really know of Jesus Christ?” I answered slowly, while looking directly at the inmate who hosted a smirk on his face.
“I know that Jesus Christ knows me perfectly. Knows my name, knows what I fear. He knows what I feel in my heart. Knows what makes me happy. I then shared some personal, real life experiences that had drawn me to Jesus Christ. Moments when I had stretched forth all of my heart and soul to heaven for answers, and for help.
I remember feeling, like I had a great power to testify to those incarcerated. My dream was so real, so poignant and purposeful.
Was it coincidental that the speaker talked of bearing testimony today? Was it by chance that I dreamed of such an experience last night? Could it be important that I look closer at my feelings, and the strength of my testimony and belief in God, in the plan of salvation, in a life after this. Am I doing all that can to fortify it, and define it?
Prior to my Mother’s 80th birthday celebration. I put together a book about her life. I asked her to share her testimony for her posterity. I smile, just remembering how she would call me on the phone several times a day prior to her party, and say something like this, “Shauna, will you add this to my testimony?” “I have a few more thoughts,” “Can you add this as well?” I finally had to give her a deadline. As I reviewed her written words concerning her love for Jesus Christ, and her belief in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints I felt such a warmth, and brightness of her words.
Even though Mama has been gone fourteen years her words are powerful and true, and shall be forever a bright light and testimony.
When I think of my Savior, Heavenly Father, and the Holy Ghost I am humbled, grateful that I know and feel that I am of great value to them. I learned for myself of their love and interest in my life and eternal purpose.
As far as my dream, it was timely. Perhaps there are those who are prisoners of their thoughts, held hostage by their past, afraid of the dark, and afraid of the light. I need to stand ready to reach out, light the candle of faith and open their imprisoned beliefs--to testify and let the light of Christ warm their souls.
