A STONE'S THROW
by
Shauna Brown
For as long as I can remember, on Sunday afternoons our family would travel to see my Mother’s family. The little brick house bulged with cousins, aunts and uncles. For the cousins it was a fun adventure playing in the park and water ways, rocking in the wooden chairs on the front porch and playing with the pulley clothesline in the back yard. But my favorite, if allowed, was to take a turn pumping the player piano.
Yet, sad to say, most often the visit ended with my mother having her feelings hurt or being offended. Traveling back home was often accompanied with mother in tears while listening to my father coach her through the pain, which was all too common. In fact, I recall how Daddy would suggest to her frequently, “You have to let it go,Genevieve.” There were even times he encouraged, “Maybe today we’ll just stay home.” However, my mother wanted to be a supportive daughter and sister and so she would put on her happy face and step forward to extend her love.
Over the years, I observed countless hurts, yet, I would hear my mother express and instruct, “We need to forgive and forget.” Yet, I admit, I allowed it to wedge within my heart. I began to dread going to grandma’s house, fearful that my mother would once again be brought to tears. How can one forgive and forget when it continues?
Even as a young girl I felt intensely prompted to write a lengthy poem about it, perhaps only to vent. I entitled it, the wall.
The WALL began to rise,
one stone at a time.
Conflict and envy mortared the heart.
The cement set firm.
Only inches tall it was at first.
The concluding verse:
Now old and weather worn the WALL
still stands ~ tall.
In silence quiet it asks.
“Who will tear away the first stone?
Who will cast aside the stones of pride?”
This past week a tender brushing with heaven transpired. Mother passed away fourteen years ago, but she took a moment from her side of heaven to leave a lasting impression with a family member.
I can’t begin to put into words the sweet, sweet joy that I felt course through my soul as I realized my mother is now enjoying the relationship with her mother and family that she had always wanted. I am left with the strong perception, the many hurts have been healed--- the wall has come down. Isn’t that beautiful!
The underlying message Mama gave was to encourage all of us to “let go” of those things that don’t matter. Don’t hold onto feelings, offences, sarcasm, negative comments, fears, or regrets. Let go of the ‘Why nots,’ ‘I should haves,’ ‘Why didn’t I? ,’ ‘How could you?’ Those feelings are the stones we personally allow and place in building our high walls. Walls that limit our purposes and progression, stones that we are meant to cast aside.
‘Tear them down!’ I hear Mama proclaim.
Even though I didn’t have the choice encounter with my mother personally this past week, the message is key. “Let it go.”
Enjoy your Sabbath,
Love Always,
Shauna
